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SQL Views, where the nagger went: a poem by me

Venise sunset by Jean-Dominique Nguele

Before we start

Hey everyone and welcome to the 50th post of this blog. It has been a couple months since I published something. There has been literally tens of drafts about different topics which I didn’t deem worthy of being number 50. Originally I excluded it being a poem until I had that rush of inspiration in Paris tube heading back to my parents after a day out. While listening to music I thought about what bothered me the most this year. It started as a post but ended up a poem written from my phone. A poem about an inappropriate use of SQL views I noticed not so long ago. Despite the essence being drawn from real events there is some dramatization. Why? I hear you think. Well because a poem’s gotta poem at some point. Hope you enjoy.

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No more, Bugs Funny, no more

Have I ever told you about that annoying Bugs Funny?
Bothered me day and night from his irritating company.
And another day and another night, yet again another one,
Thinking I had nothing better to do, no joy, no life, no plan.

Sneaking in my code when I was all chill and compiling,
His exception traces eyeing at me seem almost smiling.
Even mocking, it doesn’t matter how hard I have studied,
As for next few days he will torture, get my brain crippled.

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Mister Ozymandie: A song of dice and dire

Tick, tick, tick look at me it’s Mister Ozymandie,
Once more bringing, no, inflicting my opinion upon thee.
Whatever the effort, the time you put in your source,
My remarks, of your good day, will disrupt the course.

No matter how close you were to a merge
It is time for me to compare with yours my verge.
I am the biggest, the best, better than the rest
The victim you will be of my self-esteem quest.

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Monster release, you’re welcome – Poetry time

I like to write poems sometimes, even though I didn’t in ages. Also, I think I never posted any here. I hope you enjoy it,  please note that any resemblance to real persons, living or dead is purely coincidental.

Once upon a time a project manager
Decided to venture in a zone of danger
Little did he know was going to trigger a monster
Due to choices that none should ever foster
Because planning is not his comfort zone
He had to come to deal with me like Al’ Capone

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